Be Careful if You go to the Olympics

Do not sleep outdoors to save money at the Olympics. It is banned to "maintain public hygiene and the cultured image of cities."
Do not let the stifling summer heat tempt you into streaking, do not get drunk nor set off fireworks nor wave "insulting banners."
Anyone with mental illnesses or sexually transmitted diseases is banned. Smoking is not allowed at Olympic venues.
The rules on the organizers' official website say it all:
"Foreigners must respect Chinese laws while in China and must not harm China's national security or damage social order."
The security-obsessed authorities are taking no chances with the 500,000 tourists set to hit Beijing for the Games.
A battery of surface-to-air missile launchers are being deployed around the showpiece sites.